Hindi Super Jokes

अबे खजूर! जू से भागे हुए लंगूर! अबे सड़े हुए केले के छिलके! चूसे हुए आम! सर्कस के रिटायर्ड बन्दर! ... ... ... ... ... ... ऐसा किसी को न कहना... FEEL होता है! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Abbe Khazoor! Zoo se bhaage hue Langoor! Abbe sadhe hue kele ke chhilke! Chuse hue aam! Sarkas ke ritayard Bandar! ... ... ... ... ... ... Aisa kisi ko na kahna... FEEL HOTA HAI!

अब तक मेरी लाइफ एक खुली बोतल की तरह थी. जिसमे से सब कुछ परफ्यूम की तरह उड़ जाता था. पर आपके आने से सब ठीक हो गया. भगवान् करे आपके जैसा ढक्कन सबको मिले! ---------------------------------------------------------- Aba taka meri life ek khuli botal ki tarah thee. Jisame se sab kuch perfume ki tarah ud jata tha. Par apake aane se sab ṭheek ho gya. Bhagavan kare apake jaisa ḍhakkan sabako mile!

Banta: Truck dekh kar tum dar kyon jaate ho? Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha, har baar lagta hai kahi usko vapas karne na aaya ho!

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho? Santa: Suicide karne ke liye Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai? Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye

Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi. Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai? Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi.

Jija: Sali ji, aapke yahan ki sabse mash-hoor cheez kaunsi hai? Sali: Jija ji, jo mash-hoor thi, usey to aap le gaye!

Husband was Throwing Darts at His Wife's Photo Not Even a Single One Hitting the Target... From Another Room Wife Called The Husband: Honey What Are You Doing... Husband: "MISSING YOU"... :)

There are 3 kinds of men in the world: Some remain single & make wonders happen, Some have girlfriends & see wonders happen, The rest get married & wonder what happened!

1 Bikhari: Meri cycle koi chori karke le gya or Nayi Bike chod gya... 2ra Bhikhari: Arey tu to sachmuch lut gya... YEH TO PETROL SE CHALTI HAI!!!

Husband: hypnotise karna kya hota hai? Wife: Kisi ko apne control mein karke apni marzi ke kaam karwaana. Husband: chal jhooti usay to shaadi kehte hain

Doctor: Aapke 3 Danth Kaise Tut Gaye Santa: Wife Ne Kadak Halwa Banaya Wo Khaya Isliye Doctor: Halwa Khane Se Mana Kar Dete Santa: Fir to 32 Ke 32 Tut-te (Characters count:153 )

Sir : Teri Shikayat Aayi hai ki Tu Gaaliyan Bohat Deta hai... Student: "Sir, Maine Toh Kabhi kisi Kutte Ke Bache ko Gali Nahi di hai, Pata Nahi Kis Ullu k Patte Ne Aap ke Sath Yeh Ungli ki.. Agar Woh Harami Saamne Aajaye Toh Us kamine Ko Dekh Lu... Sir Aap ka Student, kanjar Ban k NaCh Lega , Lekin Kisi ko kabhi Gaali Nahi Dega... !!! ;) :D

Baap apne 6 saal ke Bete Se: "So Jaa Nahi To Bhoot Aa Jayega" Beta: "Aap Logo ko Bas Romance karne ka Bahana Chahiye, Chahe Bache ki BhoOt ke Naam Se Fat Jaye" (Characters count:160 )

Ek Bache Se Santa: "Billi Pooch Kyun Hilati hai ...??" Bacha: "IsLiye ke Pooch Billi ki hai ... Tere Baap Ki Nahi ...!!!" Seedhi Baat .. No Bakwaas ... :D (Characters count:156 )

Boy College Ki Girl se Bola I love U! Ab Tum Mujhe Bolo . . . Girl:Mai Abhi Ja K sir Ko Bolti Hu! . . Santa: hat pagli sir Ko Mt Bol Unki Shadi Ho Gai Hai. :-D (Characters count:159 )

How woman calls their husband in first 6 yrs Yr 1. Janu Yr 2. O jee Yr 3. Sunte ho? Yr 4. O bunty k pappa Yr 5. Kahan mar gaye? Yr 6. Tum aate ho ya main aaon? (Characters count:130, Script: English)

Generation Gap: I told my dad that i want an Apple or a Blackberry... He replied: Kinoo da season hai putar, kinoo khao.. :) :) (Characters count:130, Script: English)

लड़की डॉक्टर से: मेरी स्किन बहुत सोफ्ट और सेंसिटिव है, मेरा रंग भी बहुत गोरा है , मैं रात को क्या लगा कर सोया करूं? डॉक्टर: कुण्डी! (Characters count:129 )

संता: साली-साली करता हूँ, साली पे मै मरता हूँ, एक बात बता दूं मैं लेकिन, अपनी वाली से डरता हूँ. बंता: अबे साली के बच्चे तू , साले लफंगे लुच्चे तू.. किसी और की अमानत को देखेगा.. तो तेरी वाली को कोई और देखेगा.. अब या तो साली साली गा.. या फिर घरवाली-घरवाली गा.. (Characters count:266, Script: Devnagri)

Santa: Sali sali karta hu, sali pe mai marta hu, Ek bat bata du main lekin, Apni wali se darta hu. Banta: Abe sali k bachche tu , saale lafange luchche tu.. kisi aur ki amanat ko dekhega.. to teri wali ko koi aur dekhega.. Ab ya to sali sali ga.. ya fir gharwali gharwali ga.. (Characters count:287, Script: English)

शिष्य: "गुरु जी, ऐसी पत्नी को क्या कहेंगे जो सुंदर हो, सुशील हो, पति से कभी झगड़ा न करे, उसकी हर बात माने. गुरु: मन का बहम! (Script: Devnaagri, Characters count:23 )

Shishya: "Guru ji, esi patni ko kya kahenge jo Sunder ho, Sushil ho, Pati se kabhi Jaghra na Kare, Uski har bat mane. Guru: Man Ka Beham! (Script: English, Characters count:138 )

Santa: Achhi aur Buri biwi mein kya farq hai? Banta: Kya matlab? Biwiyaan achhi bhi hoti hai kya? (Characters count:97)

B4 shaadi: maine pyar kiya 1st Yr: pyar ke side effects 2nd Yr: Pyar ka panchname 3rd Yr: Maine pyar kyu kiya 4th Yr: Pyar tune kya kiya 5th Yr: Luv ka the End (Characters count:160)

Definition of Biwi: Biwi vo hoti hai jo shaadi ke baad apne pati ki sari aadto ko badal deti hai aur fir kehti hai.. "aap pehle jaise nahi rahe". (Characters count: 145)

Jitne channel Tv ke, Utne nakhre Biwi ke, Tv chalta hai remote se, Biwi chalti hai Note se. (Characters count:91 )

Coleg me sundar nyi gal aayi Boy: Tumhara naam kya hai baby? Gal: Sara Coleg mujhe "behan" kahta hai Boy: Kamal ho gya. Sara Coleg mujhe "Behnoi" kehta hai! (Characters count:157 )

Boy: Mere saath chalogi? Gal: Kaha? Boy: Jahan tum kaho. Gal: Ok, police station chalte hain. Boy: Lo batao..ab banda apni behan se majak bhi nahi kar sakta!! (Characters count:158 )

Teacher: Ek story suao with moral. Santa: maine usko phone kiya, wo so rahi thi.. Usne mujhko phone kiya, main so raha tha.. moral.. jaisi karni waisi bharni!! (Characters count:160 )

Aapke sms aane band hai..wah!wah! Aapke sms aane band hai..wah!wah! Kya ye aapke phon ke balance ka asar hai? Khafa ho hamse? Ya fir aapko thapdo ki kasar hai!!

Barsaat ke badal aawaz nahi karte Keemti palo ko barbad nahi karte Life me kuch aise bhi "apne" hote hain Jinhe pareshaan na kiya jaye to wah yaad nahi karte (Characters count: 157 )

Riste tod deti hai GF* Insaan ko tanha kar deti hai GF Na aane dena dil ke paas kabhi GF ko Dil se dharkan ko zuda kar deti hai GF * GF - Galat Fahami! (Characters count: 152 )

Dil ke kone se ik awaj aati hai har pal dosti teri yaad aati hai Dil poochta hai pal pal hamse Jinhe tum yaad karte ho kya unhe bhi tumhari yaad aati hai?? (Characters count: 155 )

Na tum door jana na hum door jayenge Hum apna apna wada nibhayenge Bahut achha katega zindgi ka safar Tum waha se yaad karna hum yaha se muskrayenge. (Characters count:149 )